Wednesday, 31 December 2014

Change my thinking...

Donation did light up some spark
Just hope spark bring light
Help go pass the long dark tunnel

Not very keen with the word DONATION too
But words with hubby other day
changed my thinking
Donation is a free adv
Promote business
Help the need 
Show off
You get notice
Bring in business
Money are well spend then pay adv
you are helping the need
makes you feel good
I give donation a big...

Monday, 29 December 2014

My best Christmas...

I did had a lovely Christmas with family and friends this year, a little panic on Christmas morning, don't know why, all the mood and confident had gone out my mind and body, feel weak all over, nearly lost the confident to drive, feeling my friends polarbear are all over me hugging me... want me to go with them. It feel like a panic attack, take me whole morning just wrap two little presents I left from the night before. I am no good to do anything now, can I go back to work next week. Tear start running down like a tap thinking of the future. Well, thank GOD the mood had pick up a bit toward my little brother's party. And surprised I didn't fall asleep this year on the sofa. Boxing day had my brother and his family over for a turkey dinner hubby cooked. I am a princess for a changed. No cleaning no cooking, world's luckiest woman. LOL... 





click here: Merry Christmas 2014 for more photos. Enjoy!


Not really want to post this, but the rock are getting heavy, I just want to be understand... 

I hope this is just me being sensitive... I feel like I am under the category on the subject other night in the party - Donation. The conversation makes me feel like I was being put in that category... "Donation is a way of showing off!" but we can't paint everyone with the same brush. I feel I am being painted with the same brush when that said. I would love to say a few words but I swallow back instead. I don't want to make a mess in the party... :-)

MRW charity lunch is not only for charity. Original it's call Mei's diner to hope show off some frozen ready meal to support myself living on my own, so I can give up my cleaning work for school. The lump at my back will not take me to our dad the GOD, I got to carry on fighting to stay alive few more years in this www with my polarbear and being on my own most my time with out my family is so hard to think and cope each day and the size like a tennis ball lump at my back is killing me with all the other medi I need to take, God keep showering on me with all kind of friends, sorry God, got to find something to blame... and you're the only one won't fight back... or is it... all those friends you shower on me is a fight back? :-) Each day my body battery feel like going home too, I don't know how long I can keep up cleaning work, I am 57 come up but I really feel like over 100 now this past few years, with all the illness god gave me and the medi I need to take, makes me tired all day long, had days I don't see any fun to keep going, why can't I be the lucky one like some others... follow our father the GOD to hell... or where ever he is. My battery had its time with the www. Never give up need to call an end now for my dreams, I hope I can manage one more charity lunch before I say good bye to MRW charity lunch. Dream is dream... they're good for hope, hope help you look forward in life. But there are times, we need to let some go... and not all dream can come true, we need to know that... but do keep dreaming, you never know what tomorrow will bring. Not really want to bring this post up but the mood are like yoyo lately and keeping inside my head don't make polarbear easy, my polarbear friend love my home, I have no peace lately at home with polarbear. God... get him out! I hope this post will get the rock off my chest. I had enough holding on... get that rock off GOD!

Wednesday, 10 December 2014

Seasons Greetings

Wishing all my friends and readers
Merry Christmas!
Happy New Year!

Lots of Love

Tuesday, 4 November 2014

Talking to myself... :-)

I should have my photoblog in a new Google account and I have one already for it. But don't know why I didn't use it. I don't really want the photoblog have link with this blog But thinking the big number in some post might do good for the photoblog. Still don't understand those big number behind g+1 mean? They look yum but are they real? The count go up and down and sometime it move and disappeared and come back. When I still building my photoblog, it was set private but I have big number count already and it's over 300k in just few days. The g+1 count going up and down like yoyo every day, it's on the top left corner of the dashboard in the home page, very strange! In Mei's Steamy Kitchen my higher g+1 count is 49286 for my old post call "I make it!" I can understand why, the writing story and writing is good. What i don't understand is how come a new blog still in processing and not for public to view and the g+1 count is up and down like yoyo, in just a few days it over 300k something if I havn't got it wrong, I show hubby and he haven't a glue what is that mean. If the g+1 is like a facebook's like, but how I get the like if the blog is set for private just for the authors. And shoot up like a rocket in just a few days. I did open to public once for testing while I am still building the blog, only for a short time. The 300k g+1 number count is gone after I think its time to go public. After I changed the photoblog to public, the 300k g+1disappered. I was a bit disappointed. Nice to show off that big number on any blog, don't you think? I don't want big number on my facebook I will to busy to keep up with so many likes or comment. But this g+1 is different, there is no new to reply or visit back to say thank you. It's good stuff for business. But I am very diappointed with that game from g+1. I don't believed anything now, everywhere is porky pie... I work at home most my life for dad in the kitchen and not have much experience with the outside world, I did had a little more fun then my two little sisters. I had left dad's take away after some drama with him. I left his take away a few times and work in London to do sewing and work in other people takeaway. The wage is more then double what dad pay me. There is no wage for the first few years, work 7 days a week no holiday, 15 years only had 3 holidays, and he had the heart to say: "Give it to daughters is like give it to stranger!" What a dad! 3 daughter work like hell for him in that little oven hot kitchen from 16 to 35 before left home marry. Our kind loving dad we thought he is tell my little brother give it to daughter is like give it to stranger! Any yes two little brother did help in the shop two but its not like 3 elder daughter work like hell for him full time and and I work 7 days when he just take over the shop from uncle, The shop open 7 days a and all my sisters and brothers still at school, they all help when they come home, we also have a one full time staff and my aunty help too in the weekend, The takeaway is busy in the old days, everyone work like hell there. Its small and hot like a oven. I think we can have a medal for working there. Two brothers help too but that is still not fair. I am hurt! I do love my dad and thought he love us too but he is a real slaves driver using the daughter like this. No wonder he die alone in China and not a single one is with him when his passed away in the hospital. Mum have everyone with her when she die in hospital. I do believed sometime, you get what you do. So be kind!

I was young not have much worry about stuff with people and the world. I just don't like dad attitude with things at home. That is all, even mum told me to find job and leave dad when she saw me crying in the bathroom. She was so understanding at that moment. Mum understand my hardtime working in the kitchen and dad's attitude. She don't want me suffer more, Must be my last attend to leave the takeaway. I think 3 times I left dad's takeaway, twice dad ask me to come back. I was a little shock when mum saw me crying in the bathroom, my heart feel a little warm from my mum when she tell me to leave dad. She want me to be happy, my mum understand me she love me, she don't want to see me unhappy working all my life just for dad in the kitchen. Dad's attitude is stink. He is a very selfish man. God, it's all coming back, not really want to get this out again, but who care now, I don't care the whole world know... I write to get myself free... the pain, the worry the hurt that been hiding for too long, it need fresh air again! LOL... I don't know what I am writing here tonight but I love it. I am getting more and more love my writing now, wish I am still a little girl, I can start all over again at school to learn better English. Sharing the world with my friend Polarbear. I love you Polarbear! God, what is up tonight. Better stop now. Will vent more next time. Enjoy friends! Mei  (edited 16/9/2015)

Wednesday, 29 October 2014

Katy-Mei Photoblog

Hello everyone! Mei been busy building a new blog for her photos... nearly think I am going nut again! Never give up work again! A photo blog I been trying to build for ages! I let too many things drag! I had days I wish I can have another brain I can ask for help sit next to me! Don't know how many time I had fail and tried, its nearly there... one more go, again and again till I got it right. I must be crazy mad want this blog finish, I have two days working none stop day and night not one mins sleep. I tried again and again too many times, to see how things work to build my new photo blog. I am so glad I got this far. I still got my stubborn mind like the old days when I tried to knit with pattern, with very little English I managed learn to knit all by myself. Dreaming to knit is a very old dream since I was a little girl watch my neighbour knit, I wish I can knit one day... That dream take me years and years unpicked redo with very poor English, no one knit in the family and I did tried my best to teach my two sisters, one managed finish knitting a cadi and leave me finish the join up! I love see people knit, some knitter are very clever they do without pattern book, I am no good without the pattern. I have not touch my knitting needle for years but still dreaming to knit one day! When the mind are not so busy. Too much going on... The again and again is worth it. Not one minute sleep last Saturday working on this new blog. I'm nearly there... one more try one more try! I don't know how many times I had redo retried... still not 100 happy with the blog yet but will do for now. I will really go nut carry on to find out more how things work! Need a break now and thank GOD once more... not giving up have show some colour to my work. I am very please with this new blog and hope you like it too! Still got a lot to do yet and hope sharing this happy dream takes me back to some beautiful memories... Katy-Mei memories lane... believe him or not? I like to say thank you GOD once more! :-) Keep the dream going Katy-Mei, Don't give up!

Here is the link to: katymei-photoblog Still got alot to dream... Please feel free to leave your feedback or a comment. I appreciate it very much. Thank you for your visit!

Saturday, 11 October 2014

Saturday, 4 October 2014

A dream I dream...

Writing this morning on facebook I like to share:

God, I just realised I don't need get ready for work, it's Saturday! Am I right? Yes, just checked my laptop, Been up just before 3, how many years I been a early bird now? May be learning to write online is the best option... I really want to write a book about my illness, my blogs. But I don't know how and my English is another reason keep put me off... worry people will laugh when they read my writing my story.
I gave up my after school clean, still keep my morning clean. But can it manage all the bills? I hope to have more times work on my cards, painting and writing, dreaming they can help me pay bills one day! Will they come true... I don't know! Just keep dreaming! It's the dreams keep me going now, otherwise what can I do, got to have dream to keep alive! But most the times... I waste times on my dreams... I feel useless but I do have days I talk to myself... yes, I can do it, give it another chance... GO, try it!
I am giving writing a good think, I hope to finish the book I dream one day...
I will open up all my old blogs again soon! Some post is a little hot n spice, but I will change its name, character or place. I don't need add to my dream book but those are the hot post. I hope my dream book will come true one day... remember small step Katy-Mei!!! And thank you for all my FB friends, blog friends your encouragement and kind words. Mei
Have a great weekend everyone!

Saturday, 4 January 2014

I make it...

"It's real this time! I MAKE IT... I make another old dream come true! Wonton Sunday with Katy-Mei. Another something I dream... been stewing for years!  Life isn't easy after a MVD surgery for Trigeminal neuralgia. No one want to be a full vegi, making Wontons, dumplings... help me move on, keep me going!" 14 Nov 19

Another dream come true... Great start for the new year! Small step a time... keep on going! And I hope one day the other half "Guess the cook" will come truth too... if not its only another SO! Life is fun... enjoy every mins. Leave the past behind... head straight toward your dream. Dream keep us going!

Thursday, 2 January 2014

2014 New Year

Happy 2014 everyone! 
Peace and Joy
for the New Year... and a healthy mind and body!